Tiger Eyes
by andi330
Summary: AU  James survives the night that Lily dies and Harry is marked. He, Sirius and Remus will raise baby Harry together, as they try to rebuild their lives. No flames please. Constructive criticism is welcome.
1. The Survivors

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any other characters or settings created by JK Rowling.

Tiger Eyes

By: Andi330

Chapter 1 – The Survivors

Sirius Black landed his motorcycle outside what had once been the home of James and Lily Potter late on Halloween night. He was panicked, and sure he would find the entire family dead. The house was in ruins, yet, there was no sign of the Dark Mark. _Was it possible,_ he wondered,_ that something happened to stop Voldemort before he could finish?_ Hope flared briefly within as he dismounted his bike and raced inside what had been left of the Potter family home.

"James," he shouted, "James are you here? Lily? Please, God someone answer!" Desperate to find his friends, praying to whatever god might exist as he ran through the house. He could hear the sound of a baby crying in the direction of the nursery and ran for it, not stopping to check the other rooms. If there was a child crying then Harry was alive! Maybe James and Lily were with him, trying to calm him after his fright. "James! Lily! Answer if you can hear me!"

Sirius turned the corner into the nursery and his heart broke. James was nowhere to be seen, and Lily lay dead in front of Harry's crib. Harry was standing behind her, blood dripping from a cut on his forehead, screaming at the top of his voice, tears streaming down his tiny face. Sirius snatched Harry up as his own tears began to fall, "Shh, there, there Tiger Eyes, Padfoot's here. No one's going to hurt you anymore." He blotted at Harry's head with his handkerchief. He'd never been good at healing spells, and he was too upset to concentrate. He'd get Dumbledore, or Madam Pomfrey to fix it. He would have to take the boy to Hogwarts; he'd be swarmed at St. Mungo's, the infant who survived an attack by Voldemort. Besides, if anyone would listen to his story, it would be Dumbledore, and he couldn't go looking for Peter until he was sure Harry was safe.

"Mama!" screamed Harry, squirming for all he was worth to get down. "Mama!"

"Hush, Harry. Oh, my little puppy, Mama can't wake up now. She's sleeping Tiger Eyes, let her sleep." Sirius didn't know what else to do, how could he possibly make a one-year-old understand that his Mummy was dead; that she couldn't hold him, or kiss his hurt better anymore.

"We have to go find Daddy, buddy. Will you help Padfoot find your Daddy for you?" Sirius turned to leave the nursery, but before he went, he grabbed a bag with some nappies, some bottles, and added Harry's blue blanket, a few changes of clothes, and his three favorite stuffed toys: a stag, a black dog, and a grey wolf. If he had to take Harry with him tonight, he would need some things to care for him with, until he could replace what had been lost, and Harry wouldn't sleep without those toys.

He took Harry out of the nursery, and went down the stairs, which were shaky now, after the destruction. He headed for the living room. He was hoping that James would be there, it was the one room on the first floor where the most destruction had occurred. Perhaps James had tried to hold Voldemort off so that Lily could escape with Harry.

Harry's playpen was set up in the kitchen, presumably where Lily and James had last had him in it, perhaps while they were fixing dinner that evening. He put Harry down in the pen, gave him his animals and said, "Padfoot is going to look for Daddy now little one. But I won't leave without you, be good for me while I look for Daddy, ok?" Harry's screams had turned to sniffles and he rubbed little baby fists against his eyes, those green eyes that looked so like his mother's had. Those eyes that had earned Harry his nickname, because James always called Lily his Tiger. He nodded and sniffed, and sat down in the pen, grabbing his stuffed "Moony" and holding on as if he would never let go.

"I promise that I won't leave until I come and get you. I just have to find Daddy before we can go." The hope that had flooded his heart when he realized the Dark Mark was missing had long since evaporated. Harry was alive it was true, but Lily was gone and he had seen no sign of James. There had been no sound indicating that James was alive somewhere. Surely if he had survived he would have gone to Harry when he heard him screaming. James would never have let Harry scream like that without doing something.

_If James is dead too, I don't know what I'll do,_ thought Sirius. _I may not have killed them, or betrayed them myself, but if James is dead, then I've as good as orphaned Harry. I might as well have killed them myself. I suggested the change. They never would have chosen Peter if it weren't for me._

Sirius was searching the rubble that had been the Potter's living room, searching for any sign of James. He turned over a piece of wall and discovered a foot, then heard a low groan. "God, James! James I'm coming, just hold on!"

He pulled out his wand and shouted, "_Wingardium Leveosa_," levitating the section of wall off of the man who was his best friend, his almost brother, brother in every way except blood. James was battered and bruised, and he appeared to have several broken bones, but he was undoubtedly alive. "James! James can you hear me? Wake up James!"

Now that he knew James was alive, he knew what he had to do. James was too badly injured, he wouldn't be able to bind all of his bones and he couldn't side-along apparate with both Harry and James, there was too much risk of a splinching. _"Expecto Patronum,"_ he cried, releasing his Patronus and sending it to Dumbledore with his message. Dumbledore would come as soon as he got it, Sirius was sure, and then everything would be sorted out. James seemed to be in no real danger of dying; he was just in a lot of pain. Pain he could live with, and Dumbledore would see to it that he was healed once he got here. Then the story could be explained, Remus would be sent for, and the hunt for the traitorous Pettigrew would begin.


	2. Realizations

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any other characters or settings created by JK Rowling.

Chapter 2 – Realizations 

During the twenty minutes or so that it took Albus Dumbledore to arrive at the wreck of the Potter's home in Godric's Hollow, Sirius Black felt that he lived a lifetime. The loss of Lily was more devastating than anything he could have imagined. If James was his brother, then Lily had become his sister, and the two of them together were more family than he had ever known. After ensuring that James was not in danger of dying, he had returned to the kitchen, where he sat holding Harry on his lap, rocking him back and forth, tears of anguish rolling down his face.

He wondered if it would have been this painful if it hadn't been his fault. He was terrified that James would blame him when he woke up, and understood that Lily was dead, but he was also terrified that he wouldn't. That James would look at him and tell him that it wasn't his fault; he couldn't have known that it was Peter who had been the spy. No one had suspected Peter. He needed to be forgiven, but some part of him, the part that felt guiltier than he had known was possible, wanted to be hated.

He couldn't bring himself to voice the words he was thinking, as he cried into his godson's hair. _I'm so sorry Tiger Eyes. I'm so sorry that your Mummy is dead because of me. I should have known that Remus would never betray us. I should have guessed, somehow, that it would be Peter if it were anyone. I should have gone with the original plan, or even convinced James to take Dumbledore up on his offer. I'm sorry that you're home is in ruins, and your Daddy is hurt. You will never know how sorry I am little one. I will never be able to make this better._

Silent tears became sobs of pain when he thought of what Harry would never know. He would never know Lily, the wonderfully intelligent woman who was so brilliant at potions and charms. The woman who brought out the best in each of the Marauder's, who believed in each of them and didn't hesitate to tell them. The mother who should have kissed all of his bumps and bruises better as he grew up, who should have explained exactly what that first crush would want him to do so that she would notice him, and then hold him while he cried when it didn't work out.

There is so much that you should have been able to share with your Mummy, little one. So much that you will miss, and so much that she will.

Sirius fought to regain his control. He needed at least a tenuous hold on his emotions. James might or might not wake on his own before Dumbledore arrived, and he would need to be able to begin the explanations. Dumbledore might be skeptical of his claims, but as long as he could give a coherent explanation, he would withhold judgment until James was awake to verify the situation. Taking deep breaths, he swiped at his eyes with one hand, still holding Harry on his lap. His little puppy had fallen asleep, so Sirius carefully laid him in his playpen, while he went back to the living room to check on James.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore was hurrying in the direction of his office on the grounds of Hogwarts. His normally ordered mind was in turmoil as a result of the Patronus he had just received. Lily was dead, James and Harry had somehow survived, and _Sirius_ of all people was the one to contact him with the information.

_Clearly,_ Dumbledore thought to himself, _all is not as it seems. I assumed, no, I was told that Sirius was the Secret Keeper. However, it seems unlikely that he would contact me to let me know what was happening if this were so. I can therefore assume that there is more to this story than I expected. It may be both joyful and terrible news. This night we will know the name of our spy, unless the one chosen by the Potters was broken under torture._

Dumbledore's first instinct had been to contact his friend Alastor Moody, current head of the Auror squad to have Sirius arrested immediately. However, once he regained control over his emotions, he realized that he could not. If James and Lily had changed their decision to use Sirius as Secret Keeper, if they had chosen another, then Sirius deserved the chance to make his explanations. The current administration was such that it was unlikely Sirius would receive a trial; he would more than likely be sent straight to Azkaban.

I must prevent this from happening, at least until James regains consciousness, and is able to tell us exactly what took place this evening. And if Sirius is truly innocent, and Lily truly dead, then it is all the more important that Sirius remain free. James will need much help during the grieving process, and aside from Harry, Sirius is the closest thing that James has to a family. Dumbledore reached the gargoyle outside of his office and gave the password, "Fizzing Whizbee." When he reached his office he went straight to his phoenix. "Fawkes my friend, I need you to take me to Godric's Hollow," he said to the scarlet bird. "James and Lily have been attacked." 

In a flash of fire that would have temporarily blinded anyone watching, Dumbledore and Fawkes disappeared; only to reappear seconds later outside of what had been the home of the Potter family.

* * *

Sirius had been checking on James at the moment Dumbledore appeared in the street of Godric's Hollow. Still unconscious, James was breathing steadily and had a good pulse, alleviating some small amount of his anxiety. The bright flash from outside the house was one of the most welcome sights Sirius thought he had ever seen. He knew that it meant the arrival of Dumbledore, the one person who would be willing to listen to his side of things before passing judgment. It meant his chance for freedom, and hopefully, and chance to catch Pettigrew before he could disappear entirely.

Double-checking the playpen to ensure Harry was still asleep in his playpen, he then raced outside to meet his old Headmaster and mentor. "Professor," he said in a rush, "I'm so glad you're here. James is hurt; he's still unconscious and Lily—oh God, Lily." The tears that he thought he had under control spilled down his face as he thought of Lily, lying upstairs in the house that she had once called a home.

"Show me to James, Sirius," said Dumbledore quietly. "I will see to him, and to having Lily moved, and then I will need you to explain what has happened here tonight. I believe there are many things which I do not yet understand."

Sirius led the way into what had been the Potter's Living Room where James still lay unconscious. "I couldn't tell the extent of his injuries, so I was afraid to move him sir."

Dumbledore knelt over James, pulling back the blanket that had been conjured over him for warmth and to combat shock. Waving his wand over the young man in a complicated pattern, his face looked grave as various injuries were shown in red over his body. "He seems to have several broken bones and some internal bleeding. We need to get him to the hospital immediately. I hesitate to send him to St. Mungo's, I suspect some of Voldemort's people are working there, and as word of what has happened makes the rounds, James will be in further danger." He looked at Sirius gravely, his normally twinkling blue eyes somber. "I will have Fawkes take him to the hospital wing at Hogwarts. Poppy Pomfrey should be able to handle these injuries well enough, and if she needs further help we can contact a Healer that I trust."

Sirius nodded, roughly wiping at the tears still running down his face with the back of his hand. "I want to go with him sir. Can I take Harry, and go with him? I promise, sir, I swear, I will be there, with Harry, when you get to the school. I can't leave him alone though. He'll need me when he wakes up, and someone has to take care of Harry until he's able to."

Dumbledore looked deep into the eyes of the young man before him, discerning the truth of his words. "That would be acceptable, Sirius. Go and get Harry and bring him here. I will send you to the Hospital Wing with James. You can tell Poppy that I will join you shortly."

Sirius went to the kitchen and gently lifted the sleeping Harry out of his playpen. He made sure to grab Moony, Padfoot and Prongs, placed them in the diaper bag he had already packed, and returned to Dumbledore. James now lay on a stretcher, which had been conjured for him. "Fawkes my friend," Dumbledore said to the phoenix, "Please take these three to the Hospital Wing and then return to me here. The young man on the stretcher needs medical attention, and we must see to his wife as well."

"Lily is upstairs in what was the nursery sir," said Sirius. "I didn't want to move her, in case you needed to see her to better understand what happened tonight."

"Thank you, Sirius," said Dumbledore. "I will see you in no less than an hour's time. At which point, I need to understand exactly how this evening's events came about."

"I promise you sir, I will explain everything, when I see you at the Hospital Wing."

Sirius placed a hand on the stretcher, the other firmly around a sleeping Harry. Dumbledore nodded to Fawkes, who landed on Sirius' shoulder, and carried the three away in a bright burst of flame.


	3. Revelations

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any other characters or settings created by JK Rowling.

Chapter 3 – Revelations 

A column of flame appeared in the hospital wing of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. When it had dissipated, Sirius Black stood holding the end of a stretcher and a one-year-old child. "Madam Pomfrey!" he yelled, eyes searching for the school nurse, "I have an emergency!"

The school matron hustled from her office looking for the cause of the disturbance. "Mr. Black! I have sick children here! What is the meaning of all this—," she stopped suddenly as the sight of the trio met her eyes. She quickly looked over the three, Sirius Black covered in dust and debris, young Harry Potter a gaping cut on his forehead, and James Potter unconscious and looking as if he were on death's door. She rushed to their side taking charge immediately. "Sit down on one of the beds and hold the baby Sirius, I'll take care of James."

Sirius did as he had been told quickly and quietly, trying to keep Harry as calm as possible, and charming a privacy screen to prevent the prying eyes of curious students from invading the privacy of his best friend and godson. Harry had woken at Sirius' yell, and though he hadn't started crying yet, it was a near thing. Sirius sat him down on the bed next to him, pulling out Moony, Padfoot and Prongs for him to play with. He dabbed again at the cut on Harry's forehead, which seemed to be bleeding less than it had been. Much as he wanted his puppy healed, he knew James needed Madam Pomfrey much more at this moment. Harry's cut, while slightly bleeding and probably somewhat painful, was not life threatening. His father's injuries most likely were.

Sirius wanted desperately to know his friend's condition, but he knew too well that Madam Pomfrey would not take well to being interrupted while she was working, so he did his best to turn his attention to the child sitting next to him. Harry was staring sadly at his daddy, clutching his stuffed Prongs and quietly sniffling. It was as if he knew that he needed to be quiet so that Madam Pomfrey could make his father better.

"Hey, little puppy," Sirius said quietly. "Daddy's going to be just fine, you'll see. Madam Pomfrey can fix anything." Harry slowly turned and looked at his godfather, as if trying to determine if Sirius was telling the truth. "I promise Tiger Eyes, Daddy will be just fine. I know you're sleepy, why don't you try to sleep?"

Harry shook his head and said, "No seep Pa'foot. No seep." His actions belied his words however, as he rubbed his sleepy eyes with two tiny fists. He was struggling to keep his eyes open.

"Tell you what Tiger Eyes," said Sirius. "I'll hold you right here while I'm lying down. If you don't want to sleep you don't have to, but Padfoot needs you to stay here with him. Will you do that for me?"

Harry nodded solemnly and reached his arms up to be held. Sirius lay back on the bed and held his godson against his chest. It wasn't long before he could tell Harry had fallen asleep. Despite himself, his eyelids were drooping as well. He quickly put a charm around the bed to prevent Harry from rolling or crawling out, and let sleep claim him. Madam Pomfrey, he knew, would wake him if he were needed.

* * *

He woke later to the sound of a familiar voice calling his name. Slowly, the Headmaster of Hogwarts came in to focus sitting next to the bed. He had to think a moment to remember where he was. _That's right, Hogwarts. Hogwarts! James! Lily!_ He was instantly awake and alert, remembering the events of the evening. _Dumbledore will want his explanation now. I just hope he believes me._

"How is James?" asked Sirius, wanting to know if his friend was all right.

"Madam Pomfrey tells me," said the Headmaster, "that he will recover. There will be no permanent physical damage. Emotionally however, he will have a long road to recovery." Dumbledore looked at Sirius solemnly. "For the present, he has not yet regained consciousness, which is probably a blessing. In the meantime however, I believe you promised me an explanation." The piercing blue eyes held none of their usual twinkle. A deep sadness was harbored in them now and they had taken on their particular ability to look through a person, as if they were seeing in to the very soul of the one they looked at, and discerning the truth.

"Yes sir, I remember." Sirius said slowly, not entirely sure where to start. "I suppose, that it starts about two weeks ago sir, just before we were meant to perform the charm." Sirius shuddered slowly at the memory. "I came awake that night after a horrible nightmare. I had known all along, that people would assume I was the Secret Keeper. I knew that it wouldn't take long for them to come after me. The nightmare though, seemed to bring out all my doubts. I wondered how long I could survive torture before divulging the information."

"I'd begun to suspect Remus of being the spy. I knew you were sending him on secret missions, but he seemed to be gone a lot, even when he should have been in town. I didn't want to believe it, but there it was. He was gone too often, and he never seemed to want to say where he had been. If it were true, they would know instantly who James and Lily would have chosen. He would likely be able to guess my own hiding places as well. So, I thought, someone else. Someone unexpected."

He looked down, as the sleeping child in his arms shifted somewhat. He stroked Harry's hair for a moment, and the child settled back into a deep sleep. "If Remus were truly the spy, and if you were an obvious second choice, or even first choice, then we needed someone else. Someone that James and Lily would trust but no one would expect."

Dumbledore looked thoughtful for a moment before saying softly, "Peter."

Sirius' eyes filled with tears, both of relief and remorse as he gruffly said, "Yes, Peter." He took a moment to get his emotions under control. He had to finish his story, and he had to be strong for James and Harry, at least until Remus could arrive from wherever he had been sent. He continued, "I suggested the change to James and Lily, the day before we were planning on putting the charm into place. James was furious that I would suspect Remus. Hell, I hated myself for thinking it, but he could see the logic of it. In the end, they both agreed that switching to Peter would be the better idea. After the charm was performed, Peter would go into hiding, and I would take off, hopefully leading Voldemort and his Death Eaters on a wild goose chase."

"What happened tonight, Sirius? Why go to the Potter's home tonight?"

"I was supposed to check on Peter tonight. One last check on his safety before leaving myself to make sure everything was working out. Only, he wasn't home when I got there. There was no sign of a struggle, and he knew he wasn't supposed to leave the house." Sirius' voice broke as he remembered the moment of horror, the moment when he knew, that he had signed the Potter's death warrant himself. He closed his eyes against the wave of agony rising up in him as he thought of what he had done. "I knew then, what I had done. That I had suspected the wrong man of treason. That Remus was innocent of all of my accusing thoughts. As soon as I realized I went to Godric's Hollow to warn James and Lily. I hoped—I hoped to beat them there, to help them get away before Voldemort could get there. When I saw the house—," but now he couldn't finish, the horror of the day closed in on him, and tears spilled from his eyes. He didn't bother to try and wipe them away.

Dumbledore looked at him for another moment, allowing him his grief, before saying, "I believe you, my boy. Despite all of the sorrow of the day, I am glad that you are the man I thought you were. I will send for Remus, and do all I can to ensure your safety while James recovers. He will need you both in the months to come, I expect. I will also alert the Aurors, and let them know that they should be looking for Peter Pettigrew for his crimes." The Headmaster stood from his chair and brushed the hair of the sleeping child softly, "I have done what I can for young Harry, but he will have a scar from tonight forever. The cut is healed, however, and he is otherwise healthy."

"Sir," Sirius said, before Dumbledore could leave, "You need to know. Peter, he's an animagus. He can turn in to a rat. The Aurors will need to know."

"I will alert them Sirius, though I hope, some time soon, you will tell me how this came about as well. Unless it is a part of his most recent crime however, I think it will wait until a later time."

"No sir, it has nothing to do with his betrayal. I just thought, the Aurors would need to know, to avoid him escaping capture in that way."

Dumbledore nodded and turned to leave. As he began to walk away, he turned back and said, "I will send Remus to you, when he arrives."

Sirius nodded, allowing his grief, and his exhaustion to overtake him, and once more fell into a restless sleep.


End file.
